Ponderings

I'm starting to dislike the night. Normally, this is the time I thrive. But now, it's simply the time I have to sit up, awake, and think about how alone I am. Missing my family, missing my friends, wondering when I'm going to get to see everyone again. I know this summer is going to be great and I'm excited for it, but there will always be the part of me that is homesick and longing for everything I know that feels familiar.

Yup. Tennessee still doesn't feel familiar to me. It's sad. I try to embrace it, but I find myself driving down the roads in town and when I see children playing outside, I can actually feel myself pitying them... I feel bad that they have to grow up here. I know that's terrible of me. Why do I make it out to be so bad when I know it's not? I really don't know. I'm just homesick. That has to be what it is. My homesickness magnifies every little thing I don't like and makes it out to be so much worse than it actually is. I wish I could quit it.